Haven't eaten anything yet today, and I'm not hungry in the slightest. It's strange, but great. For breakfast/lunch I had a cup of tea and since then I've had half a bottle of diet coke. I've taken to drinking vodka and diet coke when I'm out, rather that bottles of calorie filled alcopops. They actually taste nicer too, think I'm growing out of alcopops as most of them now make me feel ill cause they're too sweet.

Anyway, can't remember what I said in the last entry, but I'm possibly moving in with H. Well, I say possibly, I'm supposed to be. The thing is though, I'm having mixed feelings about it. I would love to live with him, I'm just not sure about the whole mortgage thing. It makes it all more...permanent. I can't help thinking what it would be like if we got this house together and then in three months broke up. I would have to come back home, except it wouldn't really be home anymore. I would have wasted so much money on furntiure, council tax, bills - stuff that I couldn't be reimbursed for. The house would have to be sold, which would be a long, torturous process. But the most precious thing I would lose would be time. There's no getting that back.

Why I'm thinking about it this way, I don't know. Guess I'm just a pessimistic person. Or maybe I'm just realistic. I'm eighteen. At my age I'm supposed to be thinking about where I'm going to get pissed at the weekend and where I can find the best pair of shoes or whatever. Mortgages and being with the same person the rest of my life should not be things I have to deal with. But after I go through all these things, I think about H. I love him (most of the time). I shouldn't think the worst. But then again...